Arranged marriages. Such a supposedly old-fashioned concept. But for Christians, old-fashioned doesn’t necessarily mean ‘not to be done,’ does it?
I’ve seen a terrible example of an arranged marriage that has completely fallen apart. But I can honestly say that’s because one VITAL ingredient was missing. You know Who I’m talking about.
Fathers and mothers should feel that a duty devolves upon them to guide the affections of the youth, that they may be placed upon those who will be suitable companions. They should feel it a duty, by their own teaching and example, with the assisting grace of God, to so mold the character of the children from their earliest years that they will be pure and noble and will be attracted to the good and true. Like attracts like; like appreciates like. Let the love for truth and purity and goodness be early implanted in the soul, and the youth will seek the society of those who possess these characteristics. {AH 74.1}
When both parties are completely yielded to Christ. When both enter the marriage willingly, it has worked. When the husband is willing to be the head of the home in a Christlike manner-being humble, being godly, when the wife has entered it willing to respect him and to defer to his judgment when compromising of principle is not required, it yields a wonderful union.
Of course, I’m not going to arrange my children’s marriage unless they ask me to. (I’m seriously hoping that by that time we’ll be in heaven…) But like the quote above states, when we teach our children from their EARLIEST years to be pure and noble, they will (by His grace) only seek those values in their intended spouse. My example should lead them to seek only those who love Christ with the whole heart.
I pray that as I lead my children, I will guide them to love and be attracted to the good.
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